Hello / Goodbye

Today I have another introduction to my doll family- and a heavier post. I mentioned briefly in my last blog that I was feeling slightly inclined to purchase Tenney for a custom character because I am learning how to play guitar. Well, Tenney (new name to be determined), ended up joining my collection after all, but not for the reasons I had anticipated.

On April 10th, 2017 my adopted grandmother passed away unexpectedly at the age of 88. She was a German immigrant, born in Germany in 1929. She lived in Berlin during WWII and moved to the US following the end of the war to become a nanny. From her I learned a basic grasp of the German language, how to brave the jump from the diving board into the deep end, and the very important lesson of allowing yourself to indulge in a treat once in a while. (Even if that meant sneaking Krispy Kreme donuts from around the corner so your grandchildren didn't notice). She recounted her life history & memories to me, knowing that I adored and desired to know my family's history. 

My grandmother lived in Texas, and from the moment she stepped into my life she was forever 'grandma in Texas.' In fact, her last card to me was signed "Love always, your grandma in Texas." She loved the South- the music, the sunshine, the food... And Tenney reminded me of that. Tenney has come into my life at a time when I needed it the most. She has sat and kept me company while I recall and write down many memories with my grandma. When my family decided to forgo having a funeral or memorial service for her, Tenney was there to hug while I cried out my frustration. 

I lucked out as two of my three grandma's share/d my love of dolls with me. My grandma in Texas is the one who surprised me with Felicity's School Outfit and her Traveling Outfit. She always brought out her tiny replica cast iron stove for me to play with when I stayed overnight and brought Felicity. She encouraged my love of reading and bought me several American Girl books. My collection will always have a tie to her. 

Grief is fickle- it is unkind. I have found myself going from the edge of despair, to deep anger, and elated happiness all within the same day, hours even. I have the guiding hand of my counselor and the unwavering support of my wife. Time will continue to pass without my grandmother and during that time I will work through my grief and hold my memories dear. I am so very fortunate to have called her grandma and be adopted into her family. May she rest in peace.